Illusions of Grandeur – Venus VS Mars


"Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee!"

I was channel surfing the other day and came across a Muhammad Ali documentary. So, I watched a little before recommencing my search (Channel surfing can take some time). Apart from the popularity of proud taunts and the fact he usually fulfilled his words, he was a three time world boxing champion and became an icon to many. Those who had achieved such feats as he did, merely got revered for their boxing and as such the press would hearken to their boxing opinions. But with Muhammad Ali, people would ask his advice, wisdom, and opinions on other matters. Questions would range from boxing and his opponents, to other sports and how they were run; from politics to religion, his life principles and take on faith.

And, this got me thinking. Wouldn’t you want to be so great in your area of expertise, your career or generally any area of life, that your opinion would be held highly outside of your sphere? Imagine the music geek talking on subjects outside of music, (wait! I’ve done that) would my opinions and leanings be valid, adhered to or even listened to? As a matter of fact, they say you become what you profess, so I’ll do just that before I’m even asked to…


"Hey, did someone say Geek?"

Over time, I’ve come to understand men and women differently. Stereotypes have a bit of truth about them, but c’mon, not all men are unemotional, insensitive, unfaithful, frank and ergo simple libidinous monsters. Men and women mostly just differ in perspective. Let me explain further on my take on the thought pattens of the species:

Situation A: “There are millions of beautiful people all over the world”Men and Women

Man: What the -? That’s not enough. (The world population is estimated at 6.91 billion. By my calculations, even if the beautiful people were one less of a billion i.e. 999,999,999, they still aren’t up to 15 % of the world. Then again amongst that 15%, there is still a gender ratio of about 101:100, male to female)

Woman: Wow! There are so many of them. I’m glad I’m one of them.

Situation B: When one spots a beautiful member of the opposite gender (in some cases, same gender) one is attracted to…

Woman: He is one pretty creature, let me try and get his attention but if I don’t, no loss, there are millions of beautiful people in the world.

Man: I need to get me this one, who knows when I’ll see another beautiful person. There are only millions of beautiful ones in the world.

Situation C: When a married counterpart looks at a member of the opposite sex…

Man: My wife is checking that dude out? Here’s my chance to have a good look at that Blondie’s voluptuous bod across the room (pardon my stereotyping). Thank goodness there are a million beautiful people in the world. If I wasn’t married, I’d tap that. (In some cases, the man does go and tap that)

Woman: My husband is checking out the waitress? Am I not beautiful enough for him? What has she got that I don’t? I’m going to show him (in some cases, she actually does show him pepper). There are only a few million beautiful people in the World; his eyes will stop wandering soon when they get tired.

…This was the type of thinking that brought the new movie, “the hall pass” starring Owen Wilson and Jason Sudeikis (of Saturday Night Live fame). Here, two wives permit their husbands a week of freedom from marriage while they go off to a holiday resort. This becomes the mens chance to prove to themselves what they had been thinking all the while (that their wives were the reasons they held themselves back from the passing by beauties of the world).

But I digress, men and women aren’t much different at all, apart from the hormonal disparity, physical differences and a few double standards here and there, we’re all pretty much the same. No Venus, no mars, just a little perspective difference. Each of us is just as complex as we assume the other to be.


"Just like Apples and Oranges....We differ, not look like. Sheesh"

So I’ll close with this… Guys, that voluptuous “goddess” that you just saw giving you the eye; there’s at least one person more voluptuous, more beautiful or that possesses something much more eye-catching than what is exciting you right now. Guys, you’re like wolves, instinctual territoriality. What I’m saying is, naturally, you just want to pee on everything (especially when they are pretty or way out of your league). You don’t have to, fight the urge!!!


"Who are you calling a Beast?"

And, women, not all men are simple sexual beasts. Behind most players, there is a girl that made him that way, a girl that stole his virginity (Yes, it’s possible), a girl that broke his heart and a girl that treated him as just a sexual object. Most times, they are the same person. So, I beg of you to fight the urge to adapt to stereotypes but be wise, there are always semi-obvious signs of intent. Pay attention and take your time before jumping to conclusions. Besides, like the saying goes, “There’s plenty more fish in the sea”.

PS For the Nigerians reading this, elections are coming up soon, please vote and wisely. Let your voice be heard even if you happen to be faced with a choice between an honest mugu and uneducated thief.


About th3rdculture

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